John’s Anniversary Message

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Darling John,

Here we are again on this your fourth anniversary, we both hate this day so very much because today four years ago our life’s changed forever.

Time is so very cruel to us both, because ever minute of every day hurt’s, the pain that we are both going through never stop’s we are always wishing that you where here with us all, life would be just perfect if you were here with us but that sadly cannot be the case.

We always sit and write to you each year for your web site on your anniversary about our feeling and the way your death has affected us both, but we often sit and wonder given that we believe in the afterlife what you think about the terrible thing that has happened to you through no fault of your own.

We have never really sat back and thought what do you feel, are you angry with us both for grieving for you every day, do you get sad when we are sad, do you wish that we would be happy and live the rest of our lives not being so very sad, if this is so, then we are afraid  this would never be, all we can say to you son is when you are looking down on us and you are sad because we are so unhappy please understand that we both loved you so very much and without you we as a family are incomplete.

We have been to the crematorium to leave you flowers as we do every year, this breaks our hearts, we stand and talk to you and we wish we could put the clock back and make everything be alright again.

Your brother Lawrence doesn’t talk about you a lot but we know that he too misses you, because every time we see him he is wearing the chain that you always wore and Stephanie gave it to him after your death.

Every day we hear about so many people being murdered on our roads especially motor cyclists whom it seems are the most vulnerable, just as you where John, all these deaths are so very pointless and unnecessary, our hearts go out not only to the victims, but also to the family and friends of these victims because we both know the terrible journey that they are going through at the senseless loss of losing a loved one, because in most cases it would seem that drivers who cause these deaths have no feelings or even care that they have murdered someone or that they have destroyed that persons family and friends lives.

We are always wondering John what life would have been like if you where here with us all, we miss your lovely laughter, the way you made us and every one around you feel so special, your weekly phone calls, but the thing we both miss so very much son is you.

We will never forget you son even though you are not here with us all, we your parents will keep your memory alive for as long as we are both here, we will keep your web site going and keep the memory of you alive, because son you where the sweetest, kindest, loving man that anyone would of loved to have had, you are our pride and joy John, rest in peace John.